I started life as a nanny, at 18, and for the next 10 years I worked for 3 families. Most recently with a lovely working family (7am-7pm). I’ve always loved my job, I was really good at it. I could get the children in my care sleeping with no fuss, eating everything I gave them, and behaving like angels. I had perfected a single look that sufficed, I never raised my voice, never repeated myself. I knew every milestone and how to encourage and nurture their development. I didn’t care about any playgroup awkwardness or politics, I had my own circle of friends so didn’t need to worry about making new ones.
I had it sussed!! playing mum was easy!
We were incredibly lucky and blessed to fall pregnant quickly, I was no longer going to be playing mum, I was going to actually be a mum! I had no reservations, as I’d being doing this for 10 years…along with the excitement of the positive test came, the indigestion, bloating, morning sickness that lasted all day, and insomnia, you name it, I had it! I clearly wasn’t having the beautiful straight forward pregnancy I assumed I’d have. I had the most dramatic labour and birth which came with a haemorrhage, 2 blood transfusions and a 5 day stay in hospital.
When we finally got our adorable baby girl home came the colic, the sleep deprivation, the sore healing lady parts and the challenge of breast feeding, which always looked so much easier than the reality! Who knew there was so many wrong ways to let your baby latch, and the pain that came with that! Ouch!!
I was now a walking zombie with leaking boobs!
I second guessed everything, forgot even the most basic of things and over thought everything! With time the colic left, the soreness healed, and I got to grips with breast feeding. Although in public my daughter would choose to fuss and expose me to the world!
Our baby is now a spirited toddler and we have been blessed with a boy. Even with the past experience of juggling a toddler and new born, it wasn’t that easy. I panic at the sight of any rash, I have sleepless nights rocking and feeding my baby to sleep, climbing into cots and beds to comfort an over tired or poorly child, sticking on Cbeebies just so I can drink a warm tea or catch up on a mountain of washing! I’ve used sweets and cake as bribery, my daughter calls my bluff on any form of threat and find myself repeating everything.
Gone are the days of putting a child to bed and them staying there. When we go to groups I feel self conscious and secretly hope that when I manage to strike up a conversation it won’t just be about bowel movements or weaning, but we’ll hold an adult conversation!
There is no such thing a pro. Just follow your instincts and simply be the best mum you can be!
One thing I do keep with me, is how fast they grow, time really does fly. Embrace every single moment, even the coffee fuelled sleep deprived ones!
You can follow Sarah on Instagram: @good_morning_sunshines